There is no safe investment. To love at all is to be vulnerable. Love anything, and our heart will certainly be wrung and possibly be broken. If you want to make sure of keeping it intact, you must give your heart to no one, not even to an animal. Wrap it carefully round with hobbies and little luxuries; avoid all entanglements, lock it up safe in the casket or coffin of your selfishness. But in that casket - safe, dark, motionless, airless - it will change. It will not be broken; it will become unbreakable, impenetrable, irredeemable...The only place outside Heaven where you can be perfectly safe from all the dangers and perturbations of love is Hell."
C.S. Lewis - The Four Loves
Last week in my Bible study we were discussing love and this quote came to mind. We were discussing the joy of having loved, and the pain that comes in saying goodbye. In thinking of the Hutchings family, I was thinking about the death of one's spouse and how if we knew when the other would die, we wouldn't dare take the risk because of the pain of loss. I'm sure God designed it that way. But there is too much to be gained and too much to be joyful about in love than to avoid it because of the risk of pain. The depth of the pain proves the depth of the love. This also hits home as we have begun our goodbyes with those we love. My friend, Erica, has a Dr. Seuss quote on her blog, "Don't cry because it's over. Smile because it happened." I love that.
I'm trying to keep in mind that the pain of goodbyes is beautiful in itself. The fact that we don't want to say goodbye proves that we were blessed to have loved and been loved in return. I don't often consider how abundantly fortunate we are to have the friends and family we have, who love us unconditionally and love us well, who, in truth, probably love us more than we love back. Isn't it amazing that God would give us the gift of relationships, of bondedness and friendship, of community, of family and friends we can be ourselves with and who still come around time and time again? And even as we leave the friends we love so much here, we already have friends waiting for us in Spain. And I'm sure it will be hard to leave Spain when it is time. Goodbyes are hard. and painful. But it is so happy to love.
3 comments:
When I left, and now as you are leaving, I find myself pulling away! It's like if I'm not too close, it won't hurt too much. I hate that about myself and I'm trying to change. So, you wanna hang out this week? I can put stuff in a suitcase or take a car load to goodwill. Something!
Well said, dear friend. I love you and think the good-byes are beautiful too. Even seeing Abigail crying as we left the other night was beautiful-your family has been such a gift to ours. I'm thankful the good-bye was hard because it proves how treasured our friendship is, and will continue to be! And I'm glad for that.
Before we left, a friend said something to me that I'll always remember, "Your friendships will never taste as sweet as they do right now." It is a gift to have the opportunity to recognize and bask in that fact, and those relationships will remain dear and keep you going through some challenges ahead.
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